A Scent of Home

I’m training myself to shift my focus—from who hasn’t shown up for me or what I’ve lost, to who is here, who has stayed, and who has returned. Today, I read a quote on the back of my Kombucha that resonated deeply: “Give those you love wings to fly, roots to come back to, and reasons to stay.”

But my mind keeps circling back to a romantic connection I recently let go of. It’s been 2-3 weeks, yet today, it feels as fresh as if it just happened. I can smell his natural body scent as if he’s lying beside me. I see his face so vividly, hear his voice so clearly, and feel the warmth of his kiss on my forehead like it’s happening now.

I miss him. I miss what we shared. I wonder if he thinks of me too—or if he’s even spared a thought at all. But I remind myself not to dwell on the past, the “what-ifs” and “what-should-have-beens.” Instead, I try to focus on the present—the people who love me, and the men who genuinely show interest in me.

I’ve made mistakes in my past relationships, but next time will be different. I’m determined to take it slow, to be intentional. Each connection has taught me lessons, each suitor bringing something new—a better understanding of myself, more love to give, and new experiences to cherish.

A part of me hopes that my “person” is someone I already know, someone I feel at home with. I want us to truly learn one another—to listen, advise, support, and offer clarity when needed. I crave something safe, steady, and grounding. A love that doesn’t stir the volcano in me, but instead soothes it.