the Men I Once Loved

The first—

a Virgo wrapped in velvet privilege.

Meticulous in criticism,

messy in commitment.

His heart was warm,

but his ego came first.

He wanted to be adored,

not truly known.

He had no discipline—

only desire.

And still, I stayed true.

The second—

a Capricorn made of fire and stone.

Strong-willed, sovereign,

free in body but bound in spirit.

He knew his truth,

but couldn’t rise above it.

The drugs numbed him,

the demons spoke louder than love.

And still, I prayed.

The third—

a Cancer Sun, silent Moon.

An emotional ocean with no compass.

Soft in theory,

distant in practice.

He played dumb when it was convenient,

deep when it served him.

I craved his presence,

but lived with his absence.

And still, I dove in.

And then—

the Gemini who felt like fate.

Two minds, two hearts,

one foot in, one foot running.

A king in hiding,

a mirror I mistook for magic.

He touched my universe,

then disappeared into his duality.

And still, I burned with the intensity of loving him.

But now—

I call in a man

with none of your shadows,

only the gold that glimmered

when the sun hit just right.